Ange. Yeshua. xedgex.
I find myself all over the country following God's call to love mankind.
The brightest diamond;
They tell me I'm crazy, but You told me I'm golden.
So many of us are waiting for that perfect time or perfect calling…This is God’s perfect time. God does not wait for the world to get ready, He enters right into the mess. He doesn’t mind that I am not ready yet. He doesn’t mind that I don’t have enough money or courage or time. He doesn’t mind the sometimes wretched condition of my heart or the “stench” of my daily sin. God’s time is now and He enters into the mess, ready or not.
I have come to the realization that I am somewhat of a nomad on this earth. I am learning to be okay with that. I have many homes and no home at the same time. My heart lives in so many places and with so many people. God whispers to me that I really only have one home, and that is with Him. I will never be content here. I will always be a nomad. it was meant to be that way. My heart was created with a desire for a home, a nest, a sanctuary, and that can only be found with Him in Heaven. I will continue bouncing from one home to another, loving with everything I have in whatever location I am currently residing, excitedly awaiting the day when I am called heavenward and He says to me, “Welcome HOME.”
We find ourselves waiting for a specific moment, a specific call, something special. For what? How we spend our days… that will be our life. Today could be it. People say to me often, “You are so lucky that you found your calling, that you know your purpose in life.” This statement boggles my mind. I am so blessed to live the life that I do. But it isn’t rocket science. God did not part the sky and shout out to me, “Ange! Serve my people.” I read it in His word. You can too. We can all see as plain as day that Jesus says the number one commandment is to love the Lord and love your neighbor. As believers, we should already know our calling; it is to love the Lord and love our neighbors by caring for them in whatever broken state they are in.
As far as spiritual growth is concerned it doesn’t matter how much you read your Bible, do good works, or go to church. If you are not honest about your true feelings, you will be stunted in your spiritual growth with God and limited in your relationships. Many Christians try to hide their emotions because we have been taught that they are bad. In reality these emotions are very important for us to understand and acknowledge. If we don’t, all of our relationships are impacted in a negative way and we can slip into putting on our “everything is okay” face when everything is not okay. When we face reality and the reasons we are angry, sad or fearful we can begin to chip away at the hurts, hangups and habits that cause these emotions. We can start to see what is missing in our lives what has contributed to these emotions popping up. We can begin to grieve the losses we have experienced. We can begin to ask God to remove these things in our lives instead of just burying them.
